what halloween taught me

Even if I can see the kids at the door or hear them coming... once that door bells chimes; I jump!

Masks. HATE them. If I can't see your eyes and/or face I'm not ok with that. (I have this problem with sunglasses too)

If you're going trick or treating, wear a costume or have a damn good excuse as to why you don't! Especially when you're begging for candy.

I put the treats in your bag- you don't take my treats to put in your bag.

Only buy candy you like so when all is said and done, you get to eat the leftovers. YUM!

...and lastly, Michael Jackson is alive. I am certain because I gave him a Butterfinger tonight.

My Head Hurts...

...and it's full of snot!
(Gross I know but I never claimed to be all that lady like. You'll learn- I promise.)

I was feeling a little icky yesterday and had that thought... "I hope I'm not coming down with something." What exactly does "coming down with something" mean? Hmm...

So anyways...I wake up this morning...... Blaaaaaaah!!! All stuffy.. icky and down right feeling like poo' ! Boy child came in to wake me up as the alarm was doing its *insert incredibly annoying alarm sound here* and ever so sweetly asks... "awww is my mumma a sick girl?
Now as sweet as it was, the poor child only received an "uhhhhh grrrr ohhhh mooooooan groooooan!"
You know exactly what that noise sounds like; you've done it too when you thought you were dying from that sissy ass cold you managed to find yourself with.

I spent the day doing ohhhh... pretty much nothing other than fooling around with this blog. I'm learning but not fast enough. I want it just right and I don't know enough for that to be happening. Sometimes being a slight perfectionist can put a big damper on things. *mumblecursemumbleswear*

Dammit! Time to get boy child at school... go to walmart and pick up the rest of his Halloween costume stuff. Queen of Procrastinating has struck again! I finish with all that happy jazz... hang out with him, annoy him to no end about his day and talk about this mad scientist costume.

(Keep in mind I've felt ok -- not 100% -- but ok most of the day.)

Now it's time to assemble the costume because this is NO store bought disaster!
White lab coat, black hair goop, white hair spray goop, thick black framed glasses with a band aid around the nose bridge, latex gloves safety pinned to the outside, pencils, notebook, and ruler inside the top pocket and then I safety pinned 2 nasty sticky oooooey gooooey eyeballs to the outside of the lab coat. Ohhh it was pretty damn cute if I may say so myself. So off we go around the neighborhood to beg for candy. Lucky for me, I now get my chocolate fix for the next few days! Yummilicious!! He'll never know right? *evil laugh* One reason to love Halloween!

Wellllll apparently me going out on a chilly fall night in Maine was not in my best interest with this sissy ass cold I have managed to find myself with. Dammit!
I even did exactly what my parents would have screamed at me to do and what I get to now scream at my own child.... "PUT A HAT ON!! IT'S COLD OUTSIDE!!"

See.... I have proof!

But... after our little trick or treating fiasco and then the normal Friday night "hostage swap" (boy child's father takes him for the night) I now feel like crapollllllaaaaaa!!!

*warning: possible graphic content*

I have been blowing snot out of my poor nose faster than Puffs can produce these damn tissues. It's horrible. Oh but here's the problem... there isn't a damn thing there. Feels like it... it's a little runny, wet, and cold but when you place that tissue there and ppppffffffft...... NOTHING!!! Not a thing! I'm getting rather irritated and so is my nose. I can feel all this snot build up and it's making my head hurt! I no longer have brain up there- I have snot! I'm looking forward to my morning shower just so I can clean out my nasal passages; and yes, that was a sexy visual for you! I want to breathe out of my nose, not my mouth! I mean really, is that too much to ask for?

Damn you sissy ass cold for making me such a sissy!!